Currently Dirt Sense see related

So. I’m back. I’ll tell you about it later though, because I should have been in bed over an hour ago…meanwhile, I feel compelled to post something, so here is a survey I borrowed from Facebook.

Lets start it off with, why are you single?

Um, I’m not single. You wouldn’t have missed that if you ever paid attention to details.

If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

You wouldn’t have to pay me to do it (although I’d appreciate the money!).

What were you doing at 7:00 AM?

Sleeping.

Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

I don’t know. I know for sure that I’ve disliked people that I’d been fully prepared to like…

Some people were really destructive as a child, were you?

Naw…not me.

Is it possible to be single and happy?

Yeah, but I don’t think I was very happy…you would probably think I’m still unhappy, but I know better. Trust me. I’m happier than I would be.

Are you a jealous person?

Oh yes.

What were you doing last night at midnight?

I think Chris and I were finishing watching Hellboy. It wasn’t super, but I think I liked it better than Pan’s Labyrinth. I’m interested to see what that director does with The Hobbit.

You're locked in a room with the person you last kissed, how is it?

Well, if you leave us locked in the room for too long, we may end up trying to kill and eat each other…

Have you ever been told that you were going to hell?

I don’t know why, but my siblings think it’s funny to tell me that…*derisive noise*

They’re just jealous.

Would you like to put last night on repeat, and live it forever?

Not particularly.

What was the most memorable thing that happened last summer?

The Awakening.

Do you think that you will be married within ten years?

Maybe.

Have you ever gone out of your way to do something meaningful for someone?

Yes. But they either don’t realize that I went out of my way to do it (and of course I won’t point it out because that just makes me look like a jerk), or they don’t think I tried hard enough to have it count as having gone “out of my way.”

If you could change your eye color, would you?

Don’t know. Could I change it back? I might like to change it to green for a while…it’s weird to me that I’ve had very few close friends with blue or brown eyes. It’s always green or hazel…

Do you like to have long hair or short hair?

I’ve never had really short hair. It’s always been kind of long…until about a year ago when I got it cut to shoulder-length emo. I talked to Melody a week or so ago and said something about it, but…she hasn’t seen me since before I had my hair cut. It was weird to think that.

Do you fall for people easy?

No. I don’t think so.

Are you missing someone right now?

Yeah, kind of. That’s why I wish you wouldn’t ask me that all the time; I never feel bad about it until you bring it up.

Were you mad about the way you woke up this morning?

This morning? Surely not…

Are you good at hiding your feelings?

Depends on whether the feeling is anger or not.

Has anyone ever told you that they want to spend the rest of their life with you?

Yes. Then I proceeded to say lots of ridiculous and mildly annoying things, just to make sure he could take it. He’s holding up pretty well so far.

Last person you laid in bed with?

My sister? I can’t remember…it was like, two years ago when we went out-of-town to my grandpa’s funeral.

Does anyone take you for granted?

Not sure. Ask them.

Are there some songs you can't listen to because they remind you of someone?

No. I listen to them all the time.

Were you cold at any stage last night?

HA! No, but I was cold Tuesday, Wednesday, AND Thursday nights! And I was at a stage!  :D

You have just sculled a whole bottle of vodka, what are you doing?

Woah. Sculled? I have never seen that word before in my life.

Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?

Chris.

When your being kissed do you like it when they hold your face?

No.

Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

I sleep with pajamas on. Sleeping in jeans is not very comfy.

What did you do this past Saturday?

Almost nothing.

If someone were to tell you they like you right now, would you care?

Oh, I would care. I always care about how other people feel about me. That doesn’t mean I would return the sentiment though. Not at all. But…I would certainly care and I wouldn’t want that person to suffer over it.

If you were in the hospital on life support, would the last guy you spoke to come see you?

I’m sure Chris would visit me.

Are you currently frustrated with anyone or anything?

Of course, but I don’t want to think about it.

What is the second picture on your phone?

A photo of Andrew Schwab at Cornerstone.

Would you ever dye your hair blonde?

I would rather die. Although…I did discuss with Chris whether he thought it was possible to bleach just the tips of my hair. That might look interesting.

Have you ever gotten sunburned so badly that it hurt to move?

Yep. I am still recovering from Thursday/Friday. I had some words with the Sky Demon though…

End.

Reeser

Voltaire: Sooo…would you like your CD signed?

Reeser: Yes, please.

Voltaire: *takes CD* Who am I making this out to?

Reeser: Er…Reeser.

Voltaire: *bewildered* What?

Reeser: *louder* Reeser.

Voltaire: Uh, how’d you spell that?

Reeser: Like Reese with an R at the end.

Voltaire: So, R-E-E-S…?

Reeser: E-R.

Voltaire: *brightly* Okay. *fetches rum bottle from merch table*

Reeser: *thinks, indignant* My name is not that hard to spell…

Currently Mercy (Dancing for the Death of an Imaginary Enemy) By Ours The Worst Things Beautiful see related

Everyone, I am going away early this morning for an adventure in not showering for a week, and eating only carbs, and sleeping during the morning, and staying awake all night in a darkened tent and reading about the many adventures of my friend, Lestat, while I keep trespassers away.

Yes. I am going to volunteer at the Cornerstone Festival.

I will be coming home Saturday, and my birthday is Sunday.

If you wanted to know, that is.

Today was an awkward moment of my life. We got all of our supplies from Wal-Mart and Target…and then we went into Gander Mountain because we still needed camp toilet paper…and we found it, but then that ended up being all we got there. Just two rolls of camp toilet paper.

Awkward. So awkward.

Meantime, here are more monotonous lists of things.

10 Things I wish I could say to 10 different people right now (no names)

1. It disturbs me a little bit that I think of you every day. It’s not your fault, I know, but still. Weird?

2. I’d like to borrow some DVDs from you. I just haven’t bothered asking for them yet. And don’t tell me you don’t have them. Because I know you do.

3. Sorry I never remember to get on instant messenger. I am so easily distracted  : /

4. You don’t know it, but I love you.

5. So, during half of our conversations, I used to half listen to what you were saying, and mostly wonder how I could possibly endure another moment of eye contact. It was that awkward to me.

6. I am sending you salt and pepper for Christmas. You had better use every grain of it, too.

7. It drives me crazy that every time I have a friend who I think is as clever as I am, they drift away from me. You should come baaaaaaaaack!  D:

8. Ah, you have no idea of all the ill that I wish I didn’t wish you.

9. That really amuses me, how you think you know me. I am eagerly awaiting a response from you…because I want to see if you still think that.

10. You are the only one who has wished me the dark. I send you thanks, from the bottom of my little black heart.

9 Things about myself

1. I am Reeser. Whatever I say to the contrary, I am both of us.

2. Tonsil stones…are a problem for me. A disgusting problem. My throat is an open grave. Or…at least it smells like one.

3. So help me, I think I am developing a taste for old-people furniture.

4. My eyes hurt. Not typically…but they do right now.

5. I like growling. I don’t know why, but it feels nice to make that sound.

6. I am probably dehydrated.

7. I am starting to see little black things flickering around the edges of my vision. That’s how badly I need some sleep.

8. It would be nice to go back and tap the shoulder of myself from a year ago and ask it why we never noticed that Louis was a lot like us in a few crucial ways. I mean…you’d think we’d have realized it, right? Fail.

9. I have a line of three freckles on the inside of my right elbow.

8 Ways to win my heart

1. Scratch off the back of your card—you just might have the winning combination!

2. Score more points than your opponnent

3. Hack the system

4. Become a monster. The power to spirit away will be yours.

5. “Ride a unicycle backwards while juggling fire and swallowing a sword.” The person before me put that as an option. It seems fair to leave it.

6. Be cleverer than I am.

7. Be simple and endearing. This is your backup choice if 6 fails (or if the other 5 fail).

8. Go back in time to when I was easily flattered and single.

7 Things that cross my mind a lot

1. Need a job.

2. I should go to sleep now.

3. Who did I forget to talk to this time?

4. Am I really hungry?

5. I should stop reading and go get a shower…but…just five more pages!

6. When does Paranormal State come on?

7. What colour are your eyes?

6 Things I do before bed

1. Mouthwash.

2. Pajamas.

3. Debate about setting an alarm.

4. Shut off lights.

5. Read for X number of hours.

6. Turn out bedside lamp and wait for hours to fall asleep.

5 People who mean a lot to me

1. God

2. Family (can they be a collective entity? I think so.)

3. Chris

4. Melody

5. Kitty

4 Things I am wearing right now

1. Invader Zim shirt

2. Jeans

3. Grey Converse

4. Striped socks

3 Songs I listen to often (recently)

1. Do You Believe in Angels? by The Last Dance

2. Funeral Night by Bella Morte

3. My Body, A Funeral by My Dying Bride

2 Things I want to do before I die

1. Change someone’s life.

2. Love God.

One Confession...

1. I can get a little carried away with things. You must have figured that out by now.

End.

Reeser

I need an idea to come to me and vomit glitter and bone fragments, please.

Currently Lullabies for the Dormant Mind By Agonist The Tempest (The Siren's Song; The Banshee's Cry) see related

When was the last time you were annoyed?

Earlier today. I don’t even know why. Reeser was looking for an excuse to hate something, and I think he’s being completely ridiculous.

In the past 24 hours who has texted you?

Chris. I don’t like texting, so the fewer texts I get, the better.

Does internet gossip ever end in you sitting in tears at the computer desk?

Internet gossip? What’s that? Actually…I haven’t cared about it in years. That is one of the best things about distancing yourself from the high school you graduated from: so much less drama.

Do you find yourself happy at this point?

No. I’m agitated, but I don’t know why. I needed to go outside the house today, and I didn’t really do that because dinner got messed up and it was dark out by the time I had eaten. Ugh. I hate that.

Have you changed this year?

I don’t think I’ve changed that much from what I was last year.

Will you talk to the person you like tonight?

I don’t know. No. It’s already after eleven.

Will you be sleeping alone tonight?

Will I be sleeping at all tonight? No. Probably not. It will be morning by the time I decide to lie down.

Name the first person you can think of that you know that has a tattoo?

Hm. Doctor Raven.

If you were upset, who's the first girl you would go to?

I don’t know. I wouldn’t. I don’t go to people when I’m upset. Unless it was the angry kind of upset. I might fire off an email to Kerri, just to siphon off some of that rage.

What would you say if someone told you they were in love with your brother?

I’d ask her why she was telling me and not him. In fact, I’d wonder why she was talking to me at all.

What do you think of when you hear the word "slut"?

Well, just now I randomly thought of a red parrot when I read that word. I don’t know. Don’t ask me to explain it.

What does the 5th text in your inbox say?

“Michael Jackson is dead.” Apparently Chrisface thought I really needed to know.

Would you ever give your number out over the internet?

I have. I recommend doing it with caution. Although, with cell numbers, I am not as concerned because people can’t find my house via cell number.

Have your parents ever caught you drinking?

No, because I don’t drink.

How many people have you kissed who's name started with an C?

One. And that would be the only person I’ve kissed, anyway.

Do you think boys truly understand girls?

Do I think anyone truly understands anyone? No, I don’t.

Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?

No. I’m not much of a smiler.

Look at your nails; do they need to be cut?

Probably soon. Like, tomorrow. Or tonight.

Last person you talked to on the phone?

Melody, I think. I’m kind of annoyed that I got sick and didn’t end up talking to her yesterday or earlier tonight. Don’t know when I’ll get a chance to talk to her now, since Chris will be here tomorrow night, and then I’ll be out-of-town and doing all manner of things.

Did you sleep in past noon today?

Absolutely. My day and night schedule is completely backwards now. Quite an accomplishment.

Are you wearing a ring? If you are, who gave it to you?

No. I haven’t worn any of my rings in ages. It seems strange to me that I used to wear them all the time.

How late did you stay up last night and why?

I stayed up because I’d slept all day and needed food. The only way to get food was to get up, and I was really not tired enough to go back to sleep until a bit after dawn.

What pissed you off today?

I already told you that I don’t know what did it. Reeser had this awful moment of clarity, where we realized that we were fully justified in hating something, but then I was sort of groggy and forgot what it was, so now I think he’s just being stupid and hating things just for something to do. We get that way if we’re bored and left to our own devices for too long.

Have you ever ran over an animal?

I can’t drive. I can walk though…and I’ve run and jumped over my poor, scared kitty before. His eyes get all big and “O MY GOSH!” It’s kind of funny, but I feel bad for scaring him, so I’ll go and pat him. Poor kitty.

What are you doing right at this moment?

This survey…and thinking about deleting this song because I don’t like it that much. I like a few Amon Amarth songs, but not this one. Nothing special.

Have you ever gotten a mosquito bite on your face?

I don’t think so. If I have, I don’t remember. The worst ones are the ones you get around your collar, because then the fabric is always rubbing them and making them worse. Ugh.

Is there anyone you would like to fight?

No. Not today. I don’t think I could concentrate enough to win.

What did you do yesterday?

I was sick, which you can read about in my last entry. I was in bed most of the day (and night), which hasn’t happened in ages.

Where is the weirdest place you have slept?

In the chair in the production studio at Capital. I took a nap there.

What are the chances of you getting the person you like?

I think they’re in my favour. I own him, so I’m not too worried…funny that we’ve dated for four years as of yesterday’s date next month. That is a long time. I hate though, that half of the people I’ve had to say this to gape at me and are sort of incredulous about it. How can we possibly have dated that long and not be engaged? Well…we’re poor. That’s how.

Do you think you'll have the same best friend a year from now?

I hope.

If you ended up in jail, who would most likely be in there with you?

My sister? That is a tough question, because I cannot imagine what I’d even be going to jail for. But…say my sister did something idiotic, or that her friends did (that is more likely than she herself doing something stupid), and I happened to be there…I could see that as a possibility, but it’s still waaaaaaay out there.

Are you one of those people who are always cold?

Only in winter.

Honestly, what's on your mind?

I don’t know. My mind is foggy from too much sleep.

Have you ever felt like you literally needed someone?

Yes. I try hard not to feel that way though, because it’s not a pretty feeling. Well, okay. I suppose it could be if you never stop to think about the fact that the person you think you need will probably let you down. That makes it a lot less pretty.

Do you get mad when people smoke around you?

I get annoyed when it’s blowing in my face and choking me. Makes me want to go inside the door, where they can’t smoke, and press my face against the glass and make faces at them. But I don’t do that.

Is your hair naturally straight?

It’s naturally…it sort of has a little bit of a wave, but mostly it’s straight.

End.

Reeser

She’s got something important to tell me,

Though, I suspect,

She doesn’t know a damn thing.

She just likes to put on an air of mystery

To impress me. So,

When I think she’s paying

A quick visit to the future

On my behalf,

She’s right here behind my back

Making faces.

Stop shilly-shallying and lying to me!

I warned her.

And please don’t wear black.

You are not getting ready to go to a funeral,

Are you?

I could see she was miffed.

I believe she actually had tears in her eyes,

And was trembling.

But what about?

She wouldn’t say.

Charles Simic,

“My Darling Premonition”

Currently The Brothers Martin By The Brothers Martin Deaf Will Hear see related

All I feel like doing is surveys. There’s not really anything happening lately, and today/yesterday has been a miserable day anyway. I woke up and felt really sleepy, so I just stayed in bed and kept falling asleep…and then around 5:15 I couldn’t sleep anymore, so I picked up my book and read for about a half hour. And then I got up. I made it through brushing my teeth, and halfway through my shower, and then I started feeling very ill and I couldn’t breathe because it was too hot in the shower…and somehow I finished washing and got out, but it took me ages to get dressed because I didn’t feel good and threw up water all over the floor, which I then had to clean up…*sigh*

Then I came downstairs and got back into bed and Mum brought me a vitamin water so I could take some medicine…and then I decided to maybe go back to sleep, but I was freezing, so I put on some fuzzy socks and my FIF sweatshirt which I always sleep with and rarely ever wear because I get too itchy when I try to sleep in sweatshirts. It was about 7:30 then. And I woke up a few minutes after 8, then a few minutes after 9, then a few minutes after 10. Then I was starting to feel really hot and yucky, the way I always feel when I have a fever…but I was too tired to take my sweatshirt off. So I went back to sleep and woke up around 11. Then I was roasting and very dehydrated because I’d only managed to drink maybe a third of the Vitamin Water and hadn’t had anything else since about 5 in the morning. So I decided to try and get up again. And after a few minutes I was freezing again, which is saying a lot because it was about 72 in my room (I have an atomic clock that tells me the temperature), and I usually think it’s warm when it says 70.

But…I tried to get up, and I changed into pj pants instead of shorts, and I started feeling really sick and shaky. I was afraid I wouldn’t make it upstairs, it was that bad…but lucky me, I keep food in my room. I was thinking about not doing that anymore because I’m always worried about the silverfish getting into it, but I had some fruit roll-ups and ate one of them. I felt a little bit better after that, so I came upstairs and got the leftover blueberries from the fridge, and ate those. It took me a long time because I was feeling sick…but I felt better when I was done, and made myself a spinach salad. It would be really bad if I got sick after eating that, but I feel loads better now.

I don’t know if I will go to sleep again or not, since I want to go to church…but we’ll see what happens.

Speaking of church…my pastor is really very nice. Apparently, my parents told him that I write stories, and he wanted to read them. So I emailed him my nonfictions a few days ago. I am very interested to see what, if anything, he says about them. Very interested indeed.

That said, here is my survey.

Rules:

Using only song names from one artist, cleverly answer these questions.

Try not to repeat a song title.

Describe yourself:

Eloquent Verbosity

How do you feel about yourself:

The No-Where Mind

Describe where you currently live:

Rain

If you could go anywhere, where would you go:

Away From Home

Your favorite form of transportation:

Traffic

Your best friend is:

Girlie

Your favorite color is:

Darkness Calls

What's the weather like:

Unpredictable

Favorite time of day:

Child of the Moon

If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:

The Summer The Sun Ignored

What is life to you:

Real

What is the best advice you have to give:

Heaven Waits

If you could change your name, what would it be:

(we already know the answer to this, and it is not a song title)

Your favorite food is:

Sweet Nothing (I like sugar)

Thought for the Day:

Sick of This

How I would like to die:

Splinters

My soul's present condition:

Clean Again

The faults I can bear:

Violent Complex

My Motto:

No Reason

End

Reeser

“You are nothing but a lightning bug

The night flicks off its sleeve!”

Charles Simic

from “The Preacher Says”

Currently DICHOTOMY By Becoming The Archetype Dichotomy see related

Who are you?

I have been asking myself that for years now. I do not know.

Do you ever think about someone and just start crying?

No, but someone else will start thinking of someone and he starts crying. It’s no good having tearful people live in your head. Someday I will evict his entire family though…

How many windows are open on your computer?

Three.

Are you looking forward to anything?

I don’t know. I’m not sure anymore. Any time I do, I get this uneasy feeling, like I don’t want it to happen anymore. Like…I would rather just never do anything because of the surety I feel when I think that something will probably go wrong.

How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?

My dear, I am always thinking about something. If I spoke every thought I had, when I had it, I would never shut up. And…I may be wrong, but I think they lock people up for that sort of thing. Especially if I narrated every half-morbid thought that flitted across the landscape of my mind. You would not want to hear it. Trust me.

I think I keep an awful lot to myself.

Is something bothering you?

No. I wish something were though.

Where is your best friend?

Sleeping, probably.

Do you mind being cold?

I like to be a certain amount of cold. I prefer cooler to warmer.

Did you sleep in past noon today?

Yes.

Is your heart broken right now?

No. It’s nothing.

Do you think two people can last forever?

Not a chance. Everyone dies.

Want someone back in your life?

No. But I hate the idea that there are people who are neither in, nor out of one’s life. They just kind of hover there on the edge, not far enough away to be gone, but not close enough to be close. I hate it.

Did you have a good birthday this year?

I haven’t had it yet. I don’t expect much though. I’m one of those people who don’t have friends that come to see me.

Does anyone disgust you?

I don’t know.

What are you currently hearing?

My brother’s video game. Worship music…since my iTunes is happily shuffling away…

Is there a person of the opposite sex that means a lot to you?

There are a few that matter “a lot” to me. I would be sorry for anything to happen to them.

How late did you stay up last night?

It was closer to morning.

How many people do you fully trust?

None. I don’t know anymore. None, and too many. I don’t know what “trust” means anymore, now that I don’t really have anything to trust anyone with.

Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?

If she answers, maybe. I should have called her today (yesterday?) because she told me to since it was her day off, but I didn’t because I ended up doing something else.

Were you happy when you got up today?

Not particularly. I was nothing when I got up. I feel that way now, too. Stupid Louis.

Honestly, has anyone ever seen you in your underwear?

I don’t think so. Not since I took my last gym class.

Do you write notes on your hand?

I haven’t had a reason to in months.

Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

Melody.

Did you take a nap today?

I don’t take naps, now that school is done.

Does it bother you when people respond with one word?

It depends on the type of conversation. One word answers can only carry you so far…

Are you wearing something you borrowed from someone?

I don’t usually borrow clothes. These are my own.

Are you going anywhere for this summer?

Possibly somewhere…and possibly nowhere.

Do you put ketchup on top of your french fries or on the side?

On the side. I’m not very fond of ketchup though. Or fries.

If somebody liked you, would you want them to tell you?

I would like to know, but out of everyone that I ever suspected liked me, only one ever bothered to come forward, and I had to sort of wheedle it out of him anyway. *sigh* I must be more frightening than I thought.

Is anything bothering you?

You have already asked me this question. Is that supposed to bother me? Do you want me to say yes, that your stupidity bothers me? Good grief…

What time in your life would you like to put on repeat forever?

That is an impossible question. I don’t know.

On average, what do you cry most about?

On average, I cry mostly because of the weepy person who lives in my head. He’s completely unrelated to anything in reality, real or fictional…but he won’t go away either. No ides why.

Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

No. It makes me want to hurt things. And for some reason…think of piglets.

What is something you like to do when you're down?

I don’t know.

Someone phones you at 3:00 AM; who do you expect it to be?

I would be very surprised to get a call at that hour.

Do you eat whipped cream straight out of the can?

I don’t like whipped cream.

Your phone rings, what do you say?

Usually I say “hello,” and I often follow it with “how can I help you?”

Was last night enjoyable for you?

I don’t know. No. Not particularly. I was distracted.

Is there someone you will never forget?

Several.

Ever receive a really long apology?

I did one time. It was a phone message…only after I called the person back who left the apology, she proceeded in ignoring me for months, which was really infuriating since that was exactly the sort of thing she was apologizing for…

Is there someone you wish you were still close with?

Several people.

Honestly, if you could go back one month and change something would you?

A month? No. There wouldn’t be much to change.

What brings out the worst in you?

Anything that makes me angry. I am a right little monster if you make me mad.

Do you have tan lines?

In spite of going outside almost every day, I am white, white, white.

Want someone or something you can't have?

I don’t know. No. Not particularly. But I’m sure that there are things that, if there was a chance, I might take it just because I could. I don’t know.

Are you mean?

Absolutely.

What is your favorite season?

Summer. It’s the only season. The other ones are only half there…I don’t know them.

Do you mind sleeping on the floor?

Yes. I mind very much.

Is there someone who you can spend every minute with and be happy?

No. But there is someone I could spend every minute with. As long as they didn’t pay too much attention to me. I don’t think I could stand it.

Has anyone told you they missed you lately?

No. Nobody misses me.

Who makes you smile?

I don’t know.

What is your mood at this exact moment?

Nothing. Tense…the sort of tense that happens to me during summer, when I haven’t been doing anything and have started sleeping during the day and doing everything at night. The sort of tense that happens before something goes bad, either in my real little world, or in my head. Really, if I had to pick one of the two, I’d prefer it to go bad in my head. It would hurt more, but I would rather not have more disturbances in my real life.

Have you ever accidentally eaten an insect?

This is the worst: getting gnats in the eye. It burns.

End

Reeser

Voltaire: Does anyone else here even have a birthday this month?

Kid: Yes!

Voltaire: Ah, well, when is your birthday?

Kid: The eleventh.

Voltaire: The eleventh. *pause*creepy voice* April eleventh. What’s your name?

Kid: Ryan.

Voltaire: Ryan. So, if you’re on the eleventh, what sign would that make you?

Ryan: Ares.

Voltaire: Ares. You know, I don’t know why I’m even asking you all these totally gay questions. *pause* I don’t even fancy you.

*audience laughs*